Is It Burnout or ADHD Paralysis? (And Why I Often Can’t Tell)

I used to think I was just burnt out. But sometimes, I wasn’t exhausted—I felt frozen. That stuck, drained feeling? It turns out there’s a difference between ADHD paralysis vs burnout, and I didn’t know which one I was living through. Staring at a to-do list, knowing exactly what needed to happen next, and still not moving.

Since being diagnosed with ADHD at 38, I’ve started unravelling the difference between burnout and ADHD paralysis. But honestly? It’s still messy. The lines are blurred, the symptoms overlap, and most of the time, I can’t clearly tell which one I’m in.

But I’m learning.

The ADHD Freeze: When Knowing Isn’t Doing

Here’s a simple example: I remember the washing machine needs emptying. I even say it out loud—“OK, go do it.” But I don’t get up. Five minutes pass. Then ten. I’m still sitting there, my brain spinning with how annoying it is to separate the clothes into ones for the dryer (which is outside, inconvenient, and needs plugging in), and ones to hang. It’s not hard, but it’s boring. Unrewarding. And I just… don’t.

That’s ADHD paralysis.

It’s not about being lazy or irresponsible. It’s about being completely overwhelmed by a task that feels mundane, mentally effortful, and somehow emotionally tangled.

I’ve found myself saying things like:

• “OK, five more minutes…”
• “Just do it quickly…”
• “Start now—no, really, now…”

And even when I say it out loud, I sometimes forget I even said it.

Burnout Feels Different—But It’s Still Hard to Spot

Burnout has shown up for me in work settings—and also in my personal life. It’s not limited to one context. The emotional and physical toll can carry across everything, especially when I’m juggling invisible responsibilities no one else sees.

At work, I start caring less. I go numb. The ideas I used to push forward get shelved, not because they aren’t good, but because I can’t see the point. There’s no budget. No energy. No one pushing with me. Just me, already tired, trying not to drown in all the invisible expectations.

That’s when I start masking. I’ll keep smiling, keep replying to emails, keep showing up in meetings—and then quietly cry in my office. Shut the door. Wait for 5pm.

At that point, I’m not “doing nothing.” I’m actively hiding how little I have left to give.

Burnout isn’t a bad day. It’s a slow drain. A sense of disconnection from everything that once felt purposeful.

Eventually, I resign. I work out my notice—because it feels like the right thing to do—and I push through those last few weeks trying to prove (to myself, mostly) that I deserved the role in the first place. I’ll tie up loose ends that the next person may never even notice. If I cared less, I’d probably burn out less. But I haven’t figured out how to do that yet.

It’s taken me a long time to understand the difference between ADHD paralysis and burnout, but knowing which one I’m facing helps me treat myself more gently.

Sometimes I Can’t Tell Which It Is

I didn’t fully understand how exhausted I was until after my diagnosis. And by then, I’d already been living with undiagnosed ADHD for nearly four decades. No wonder I was constantly pushing through some kind of fatigue.

Sometimes it was physical. Sometimes emotional. Sometimes it was just… a blank space where motivation should’ve been.

That’s why ADHD paralysis vs burnout is so confusing. Both make it hard to start things. Both make you feel like you’re failing. Both can leave you feeling ashamed, guilty, and overwhelmed.

When I expect more from myself—and I can’t deliver—I end up disappointed and confused. And when other people don’t understand, it only makes that worse.

How ADHD Paralysis Shows Up for Me

• Freezing when my son vomited all over the bathroom floor—and instead of grabbing the mop, I instinctively reached for a towel and started trying to clean it that way. It didn’t make things better. But I felt frozen, and that was all I could do in the moment.
• Spending weeks trying to choose the “perfect” birthday gift for a friend, and ending up with nothing on time.
• Delaying post office errands because I can’t figure out box vs bag, postage cost, or what to write on the card.

These aren’t just signs of being busy or disorganised. These moments tell me my executive function is on overload. I get pulled into loops of overthinking, unrealistic expectations, or nonstop mental noise.

I’ve tried systems. I’ve tried guilt. I’ve tried forcing myself into motion. And sometimes it works—but it’s not sustainable.

Burnout Runs Deeper

When I’ve hit full burnout, it’s not just mental. I feel sick. Anxious. Like I can’t get anything right. Like there’s no point trying anymore.

I’ve never felt suicidal, but I’ve definitely felt existential. Like I don’t know what I’m doing or why I’m doing it. And I hide it. Because I don’t want to be a burden. So I smile. Perform. Collapse in private.

Guilt and Shame as Motivation (And Why That’s Not It)

A psychiatrist once told me that a lot of late-diagnosed women with ADHD use guilt as a productivity tool. That landed hard.

Because I do.
I guilt myself into finishing things. Into showing up. Into doing “enough.”
But that kind of fuel burns out fast—and leaves scars.

I’m Still Learning What’s Me and What’s Not

When you’re diagnosed late, you don’t always know where ADHD ends and you begin. You don’t have a clear sense of self yet. You’re learning a new language and trying to apply it to memories, patterns, and beliefs that have been with you forever.

Sometimes I still wonder: Is this burnout? Or is this just a bad ADHD day? Maybe I’m tired? Or frozen?

The truth is: ADHD paralysis can feel like burnout.
And burnout can look like ADHD paralysis.
So when you live in that grey zone for long enough, it’s easy to feel like no one will believe you—maybe not even yourself.

Final Thoughts on ADHD Paralysis vs Burnout: The Name Isn’t Always the Point

Maybe it doesn’t matter which label fits every single time.
But learning the difference between ADHD paralysis and burnout has helped me name what’s happening—and naming it gives me power.

I’m still rewriting what normal looks like. And part of that is learning when I need rest… and when I just need to begin.

TL;DR: ADHD Paralysis vs Burnout – What I’ve Learned

• When ADHD paralysis hits, I freeze. I avoid things. I overthink. I get stuck before I’ve even started.
• Burnout feels deeper—numbness, disconnection, physical and emotional shutdown.
• They often overlap. But naming them helps you respond with the right kind of compassion.
• Guilt works short term—but it’s not a sustainable motivator.
• I’m still learning where I end and ADHD begins. And that’s OK.

For a great breakdown of what ADHD paralysis actually is, this article from Cleveland Clinic explains why we freeze—and how it differs from burnout.